"When Last i thought...(3)

Still on it,

When last i thought ....a child!
I felt rage, i felt joy, love for
A new bor, fear of the 9months.
The early mornings, the diziness by
The day and the suspense of guilt
I held my tommy and felt the purge
Of my womb, the desire to bear within
A future, a reasonable, achievable and
Meaningful future. The chest bears nauseas
And the eyeballs weakness, the glands gets fuller
And the thighs bigger, when all sees and belges, but the
Tommy says it all bulging, bulging ....and the awaited tears
Comes to life, revealing a new hope, a new member and a better
Reason to be alive. To regenarate.

When last i thought.....Marriage
I loved you, i wanted it, i dread to
Go near it. I knew it, i always did, but
The wrong side to it. I wanted it, it's beauty
It's filt, it's glamour and it's clamour, it's
Flavour and it's rigour, splendor and 'set-ups'
I thought it good, but times proved it unfruitful,
Felt it had so much goodness as some say, but only
Seen only its foolness. The demands and remands the
Commitment and consentment/resentment
The bears and fears, the treasures and the pressures,
The love and fears, the love and the lust.
Marriage....it's got so much carriage.

When last i thought Sanity....
I felt insane, i called my mane and named it cain,
I composed some notes, i thought they would restore
Me back to my folks.But not really.
Sanity, insanity, madness and
The firmness. The reason to live, and a season to be
Bereaved, a time to be released and a time to be in total
Mischieve, the sanity of having to be living makes
One go thinking "all can't be done quickly, it takes a mile
And a tick to make a real ink on a grave".

When last i thought HELL.....!
I lost still, i dread sin and clutched to
Holiness, i kept peace with my pieces, never
Assumed greatness but conserved humility, I
burnt my finger by day to drop a lesson in my
Brain..."hell is real" said a voice.
I heard voices pleading for freedom and throats
Thirsty, but the master gave more laughter.
I called to the unaware and determined to pass
The message even to the tombs, but...but
I dropped off, i journed in life, just as it
Placed on my palms a similingly bigger mission.
What the Hell!

When last i thought.....Wealth